The salmon tasted sweet. The stir fried vegetables were crunchy . But, eating out on a Saturday wasn’t as exciting anymore. Most probably the 20 min wait at the sidewalks of bukit bintang did some damage. Or it’s the swarm of weekenders catching up with city life. Not to mention the traffic.
I’ve notice my love for the systematic trap of consumerism has been long gone. Malls became pretty much irrelevant. I’m turning into home-person these days, I’ve look forward to go back to my hometown every Sunday.
This is when Life’s at a plateau. It can be dull (most of the time) and I can feel the passion is leaving my veins. But, not in a bad way (as yet). Thankfully, it kicked out the boy craze syndrome out of the system. Maybe some call this maturing with age. Our focus is shifted to daily responsibilities and cutting cost at all means. (Read:minimising self created drama or unneccessary wants)
But, leaving some things behind gave some withdrawal symptons at times. I guess it’s not that clever to let the things you do to define you. Exhibit A: some friends save my number under the call name izzzati debate. And when I left it, it felt there’s a hole need some patching. And I thought it was my image or what I am.
That was half a year ago. Now, i’m doing part time jobs, trying my best re-igniting that fiery passion for knowledge and knowing that what takes you far is not really what the things you do, but how you see the things you do.
A wise thing to do is not to freak out if I’m not enjoying the things I used to do, and I like it how Dr Johnson of Who moved my cheese put it, ” We have to move with the cheese~“
I’ve got myself glued to the telly every time Merlin is on. I remembered getting all angsty because we were still far from home and the show’s about to start in 5 minutes. It made me read a children encyclopaedia on knights and castles. It made me google up any Arthurian legend I can get my hands on. I never knew it has Welsh origins or French poets wrote about the legend. It had too many versions which add up to its mystical charm. What started as a harmless one hour of costume drama entertainment, turns to be my highlight of every week. Even though, this Merlin is not the typical bearded wise wizard in a robe, this production is able to quench my long thirst for a good show. The line up is perfect for this one. This Arthur is no Clive Owen (which I have to admit.. I didn’t watch the movie) but Bradley James played the perfect prince with attitude. Of course, my eyes are on Merlin played by Colin Morgan. He managed to humanize Merlin in a way showing the side of him who felt all sorts of emotions. Most probably to fit with the modern audience’s palate. The music score gave a sense of novelty to my weekly Merlin adventures. The costume doesn’t look like cheap stage costume which are hardly worn or fake. Loving every single detail of the series. I don’t mind watching reruns of it 
How’s year 2010 so far? My year literally started with a bang. A long night in the ER, needles piercing my veins and a couple of x-rays. It’s not as bad as it sounds. Post traumatic syndrome is a part of growing and in my case it gave me a new meaning to life.
A couple of days later, I had a talk with mom when we waited for the bus. I told her that I truly beginning to see the world is not the reality. She knows where I’m coming from. She told me the MVA is only a mark in our life and we proceed for the next phase. However, contemplation, sudden loneliness and fear of sleeping has been quite troubling.I felt entrapped. I knew it’s another wake up call and I had to snap out of this state of mind.
The important thing is knowing that my life is on loan, I have to keep it healthy,happy and purposeful. Living in the now is not just a catchphrase. To me, 2010 is a year of budding beginnings. And like a new bud, it can be rough to withstand the weather but it is something that I’ve gotta do
Have better days ahead
Listening to the soft sounds of the piano makes my heart calls for home. It’s suffocating, the fact that you didn’t reached a good grade or ashamed with somethings you’re lacking or the uncertainty in life that scares you every night. But, to know there is love from a higher place and comfort in my hometown, it’s okay. I’ve come this far and it’s only just begun
Lee Seung Gi 이승기 – Let’s Break Up 우리 헤어지자 MV
Oh gosh, another kpop crush ;p
